It started with a text. “Hey, beautiful, how are you?”
He asked you out.
He brought flowers and chocolates. He told you how beautiful you looked. He gave you a kiss on the cheek and opened the car door for you. You went for dinner. You went on dates and you felt at home with him. He was handsome. He was charming. He was so kind to you. He was respectful.
A few dates later and you were already falling for him.
But slowly you started seeing a different side to him. Your friends messaged you about a girls’ night out, and he yelled and told you you couldn’t go.
You were his and only his.
He scared you. He was controlling and possessive. He was manipulative.
He wasn’t who you fell in love with.
You thought about leaving but he apologized and promised to be better. Promised there wouldn’t be a next time. Promised that he loved you. Even showed it sometimes. Sometimes you caught glimpses of who he used to be. Of that happiness you had with each other at the start of your relationship. And it made you think twice about ending it.
You started asking:
Am I overthinking it? Do all boys treat other girls like this? How is this normal? What can I do to fix him?
You started looking in the mirror and asking:
Do I deserve this? Am I good enough? Am I pretty enough? Is this my fault? Am I worth anything?
This is what a toxic relationship does to you. It eats away at you slowly.
Here’s our message to you: Abuse does not always look the way you expect it to. Abuse does not look the same in every relationship.
No matter how mild or severe it is, you are worth so much more.
You deserve to be happy.
You have every right to walk away from a situation that hurts you.
You are an undeniable force to be reckoned with. Let it be known that you have total control over your own mind, body and soul.
You can say no.
You are worthy of respect. You are worthy of love. You are worthy.
You are good enough, and you don’t need anything else to be good enough for someone.
You are beautiful, and so amazing. We see you struggling with yourself and we wish you saw what we see.
That you are worth more than the moon and the stars in the sky.
Know the signs of a toxic relationship so you know when it’s time to leave.
Bianca R and Candice Alaska.